Dating

The year of my mom's generation my mom told me when someone was kissing in the movie theater that was consider a big "no no". At that time she thought when you kiss someone you would get pregnant from it.

During our adolescence we are clueless how dating really is when your parents never explained what it feels when a man and a woman likes you. 

How do you find about dating? Some people are told by their friends and they tend to copy each other. Others learn from the education given by school from the birds and the bee's. Or we just follow what we see on the television show.

I started dating in the year 1990's my parents we're very strict with me. They loved it when my first boyfriend was a long distance relationship. I only saw him once a month; He would fly between his school and work just to visit me during the weekend.

Our relationship didn't last since he was looking for someone to get married. I wasn't ready for marriage that time.

I was just starting to date, dress up and finding my way to the social life. My parents didn't allow us to attend high school dances or wear make up. I hated my parents being so strict. I looked like a nerd and no one liked me. 

After my first break up I didn't date right away. I gave myself at least one year to get over the relationship. I had this theory I had to get to know that person at least a year before I had dated him.

I met guys who had low esteem they felt I was middle class and I had more than what they couldn't give me.

I also dated someone who was two timing during our relationship and found out after he called me a different name.

I also had dated a guy who pretends he was in an accident to see if I really cared for him. I even felt that story was true. I remember I was working that time. I couldn't get it off my mind thinking your boyfriend was in a car accident.

The next day my boyfriend told me he made up the story. That moment I realized I couldn't trust that person. He had to overcome his insecurity toward our relationship.

I also dated a guy who was just after my salary. He always said, he would pay me back and he never did. That is when I had opened my eyes he only loved me because I had the money. He didn't love and respect me. I was his ATM.

I am not sure if anyone met someone the first time and said. "I Love you" without knowing each other. I went to a birthday party of my close friend. There was a stranger who just came up to me and said, "I love you". I told the guy how you can say those three words when you only met me.

I found out later this guy was looking for someone to fix his papers since he came from another country and his visa was about to expire. 

It was hard for me to meet the right person since my parents wanted me to marry someone the same nationality. 

As I got older I wanted to date someone who wasn't Filipino. I guess from all my bad experiences I have dealt with them being so insecure and feeling they couldn't supplement what my parents could provide me.

Yes, I was pretty. Did you know pretty girls also have a difficult finding the right man?

During our time getting married was the final thing. 

We only met people being matched by our parents. pen pal from the newspaper advertisement, dance clubs, school, work, gym and so on.

Living in wasn't an option that time. Not how it is now in the year 2000 where you don't need to marry someone right away. You can live in with that person before you decide to settle down with each other.

You meet people on online dating there are more opportunity to meet your destiny and soul mate.

I wish we had that kind of opportunity when I was dating.

You notice more people who had less opportunity tend to file for separation or divorce realizing the one they had married is not the one for them.

Or you just loose that interest for each other no more sparks in your life. Or someone has had an affair and you are not special to that person any more.